Bridal Train: To pay or not to pay…….

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Just as a little disclaimer, this is in NO WAY a sub to those close to me (because if we are close, we’ve definitely had this conversation recently lol) you’ve simply inspired my Monday ramble and made me open up this topic to the public for further discussion πŸ™‚

So I’ve come again, as promised, with my weekly post with the hope that someone outside of my circle of friends may be able to solve this puzzle for me πŸ˜€ Who is responsible for paying the bridesmaids’ outfits for that special day? Not just the dresses to be honest, I’m talking about the whole shabang! The shoes, the jewellery, the hair, the makeup, the ‘snack-packs’ (don’t ask) the accommodation for the whole event……

Now, I’ve been having this debate with a few people and have been accused of having the mentality of ‘stingy Jand folk’ (Jand means British for my non-Nigerian readers) on this issue lol. I personally believe that if I have agreed to be your bridesmaid (it’s an honour that I have even been asked) at your wedding then I should also understand that there will be financial implications, just like if I attend a friend’s birthday dinner, I can’t expect a free meal (Depending on what friend of course lol, but that’s a topic for another day….) as far as the budget isn’t out of the roof and it’s agreed, then it’s coming out of my pocket, and if I’m not ok with it, then it’s not by force to be a bridesmaid…..

Friend 1 (all friends shall remain anonymous in this post of course) was of the opinion that if the Father of the bride is not able to cater for the costs of the above then it should be down to the groom to pay for it all, but on no account should her bridesmaids have to spend a penny on their outfits as she was the one who asked them to be part of her train, not the other way around and she definitely wasn’t going to dip into her pocket for any of her friends’ weddings. Hmmmm…..

Friend 2 didn’t see why she would have to pay for the bridesmaids’ dresses and shoes after already spending so much on the wedding already but was willing to cover the costs for the professional makeup, jewellery and hair ( I think that’s more than fair…)

Of course our dear significant other didn’t have much to say on this topic, silence was the safest option for him in this situation I guess lol.

But apparently I’m not the only one having this discussion, the almighty Huff Post kinda summarised the costs the bride should cover for bridesmaids, which I’m happy to say was in line with my thoughts πŸ˜€

According to Le Huff, it should go as follows:

Traditionally, bridesmaids are expected to pay for the following:

– Wedding attire and accessories. This includes the dress (which will most likely be picked by the bride), alterations, shoes and other adornments.
– Transportation to and from the wedding town or city
– Gift for the couple (can purchase individually or contribute to a group gift)
– Share in the cost of a bridesmaids’ gift to the bride (optional)
– Bachelorette party attendance cost (optional)

These are the costs that the bride should cover for her bridesmaids:

– Bridesmaid’s flowers
– Lodging for out-of-town attendants
– Transportation for the bridal party to ceremony and reception
– Thank you gift to her attendants
– Bridesmaids’ luncheon, tea, or party (if hosted by bride)
– Hair and makeup (if bride requires it be professionally done)

Sounds simple enough right? If only….

This is not me trying to advise you on how to spread costs and fees on your wedding day, I already know where I stand lol but I’m still confused as to why there isn’t a general consensus on this (amongst Nigerians particularly) which is why I’m asking for your thoughts, so past brides, brides-to-be, grooms with an interest any anyone with an opinion on this, don’t be a stranger and speak your mind in the comment box below πŸ™‚

Till next week sweets

Miss Mimi x


3 Replies to “Bridal Train: To pay or not to pay…….”

  1. I don’t understand this wedding wahala sometimes. Why is the groom paying for dress and accessories of bridesmaids please? Are they all going to go for the honeymoon together? Bridesmaids that the bride chose by herself?


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