I don’t even know where to begin or how to show my gratitude for the year I’ve just completed, I honestly don’t. But firstly, let me start off with saying a huge happy birthday to me!! If I don’t celebrate myself then I can’t expect others to lol.
So many people have asked me what I have planned for my birthday and my answer for the first time in seven years is ‘nothing’. Instead I wanted it to be a day of reflection, a day I can use to be thankful for the past year and prepare myself for the year to come. To say this year has been eventful is definitely an understatement. I know this sounds like the beginning of a testimony but work with me here lol. (And I have a lot to testify for so it only makes sense that it would sound like one).
This year was definitely a tough one that took a lot of strength and willpower to keep soul and body together. As usual I set many goals for myself and my personal development which all seemed very feasible…until the realities of life (and that annoying spirit of procrastination) got in the way. With a wedding to plan across the world, a full time extremely demanding job with a very short staffed team and various other obligations, many goals couldn’t be met :-(. I can’t even count the amount of times I’ve been ill this year due to stress, and I’m someone who hardly ever gets seriously ill. It was a year of understanding that my body can only take so much and if I push it too far, it will retaliate. It was also a year of discovering new strengths and talents I didn’t realise I had. See I’m someone that finds it hard to ask people for help and this year I was forced to drop my pride and ask for help to enable me carry out my multiple tasks. While I’m grateful for the many people who helped me out even without being asked, there were a few who I would have expected to do the same who either bluntly refused or offered to help and didn’t see it through. So I’m human of course and yes this did frustrate me at the time, but it was a huge learning curve for me for three main reasons:
1. I was put in several situations where I had to learn how to do it myself without assistance which also enabled me to develop new skills or bring out skills I wasn’t aware I had and build on them.
2. I learnt that although something may seem important to me, it does not necessarily have to be a priority for others and it does not make them selfish or mean that they are bad people, but this did make me more self-reliant and strengthen my independence.
3. Now this point may contradict point two a little but I did learn that although people may disappoint me at times, it is ok to ask for help when needed instead of being Miss Independent. Although I wish I did, I do not hold the world’s knowledge and there may be others who just might know how to handle a situation better than I could, there may be someone out there willing to support me in a new venture, there may be someone who knows someone with a great opportunity for you. If you don’t ask, you don’t know :-).
Hands washed together come cleaner than a single hand washed by itself- Sierra Leonean proverb
This year I also wasted a lot of time dwelling on why some people didn’t treat me or place me in the same way I would them and got upset over this. I had to be reminded by a close friend and my then fiancé that love and kindness isn’t always reciprocated in the same way. I’ve even had strangers show me more love and support than from those I expected it from closer to me. I’ve learnt to reduce my expectations of others and be good to others no matter how they treat me. So I have to say a huge thank you to everyone who has continued to support me, scold me when necessary and build me up. Old and new, I am truly grateful for you. You have all shown me that family is not by blood alone!
As well as my learning curves, one of the things I’m probably most thankful for this year is my marriage. I became a Mrs this year!! Each time I fell ill, or got angry, upset, stressed and frustrated, I had to keep reminding myself that at the end of the year I’d be getting married to my best friend and my soul mate. Lord knows that I didn’t see this happening over two years ago, but I thank God for his mercy and for giving me the best companion I could ever ask for!
I’ve started a brand new phase of my life (those close to me will know exactly what I mean), a phase I’m still trying to adjust to and while it’s still very new and a little strange at times, I’m excited to see what this new journey will bring.
Is it just me or do you sometimes see some amazing individuals in life or in the media doing great things, which you admire them for doing but also know that you’re also capable of achieving that plus more but haven’t? In the past year, there have been a few projects dropped to focus on my time-sensitive cases and now that they are completed, I’ve been inspired by a few people and pages to get back on those projects, something I automatically wouldn’t have done. One of them being this blog. I’m actually ashamed to see that the last time I published a piece on this blog was in April! (Terrible I know!) But I’ve got tooooo much content that I’ve got no excuse not to publish regular posts, it’s really down to procrastination and I’ve been inspired by a few bloggers to get back on it straight away lol. Yes I will name drop a couple now. Firstly it has to be Sisiyemmie (if you know me then you’ll know I’m an avid watcher of her weekly vlogs and frequent visitor of her blog. Seeing where she’s come from and seeing where she is now due to her hard work and dedication to her blog and brand, there’s no way you can’t be inspired. Then a dear friend of mine who is the author of the blog Crown of Laurels. It isn’t long ago that she started blogging, not even up to a year I believe and she’s gotten so far due to self discipline, consistency and dedication. Then lastly, Finally Fiona, you just need to visit her site to see why I’m inspired!
Well, as they say, time waits for no man. I may not have been able to start last year or yesterday, I may have started projects but have been sidetracked for many reasons, but I have no excuse not to start or continue today! I won’t feel defeated just because I didn’t get a response to an email or my idea or proposal was seen as crazy, silly or impossible to achieve. I’ll try my best not to let the spirit of procrastination delay my greatness. I’m setting myself a list of specific goals for 2017 each with deadlines making them a little more feasible. Because a goal without a plan is just a wish right? Now I can plan all I like but ultimately God has the bigger plan for me. He always knows what’s best for me and will always show me the way and make me strong enough to handle it. So it may not all go as planned, but if I pray over it, commit it into His hands and work towards it, at least I will I have tried and can continue striving to be a better person in life, spiritually and professionally.
I’m grateful for the recognition I have received from friends, family, fellow professionals and strangers. It only pushes me to work harder and achieve more. I’m grateful for my husband and my mother, the two most important people in my life and my biggest supporters. My family (not just by blood alone), I’ve lost some, gained some more and the love has quadrupled. For that I am grateful.
Well I’m going to stop here. I can’t possibly list everything I’m grateful for and I’ve definitely rambled for much longer than I usually would lol but hey, it’s my birthday and my day of reflection 😊.